Transition
by HotMezoti
Summary: Femshep and Vega in Vancouver. She's more Renegade in this story. Lemony content. All Characters owned by Bioware. Completed story.


Vega stood with a plate of food outside Shepard's door. Frustrated, he pinged the com for the third time.

"Commander, your meal is here."

No response. Vega opened the door. She was sitting on her bed, facing the window. She'd pretty much done that since she got to the prison five days ago.

"I said, your food's here." He raised his voice.

She was sitting with her arms around her knees. Her long dark hair was messy and greasy, falling around her shoulders. She turned her head slightly to the side and said tersely, "Fine, whatever. And stop calling me Commander."

He walked to her desk and put the container on it. He noticed the one he left that morning was still there. He opened it, she had eaten maybe a few bites, not much. He looked over at her.

"You know, you're nothing like what I thought you'd be."

No response.

Vega walked closer to her, her back still to him. "I never thought a Council Spectre, the savior of the galaxy would sit and pout for days on end." He scoffed, "Some hero you turned out to be."

"Go fuck yourself." She said without looking back.

"Yea, I'll do that." He turned around and closed the door. He stood outside her room. He was pissed off, at her, at himself for losing his cool. He wanted to pull her out of her depression, but was at a loss of what to do. Her whole attitude pretty much disgusted him. He hated seeing her defeated so easily.

Shepard put her face down in her knees and fought back the tears that had threatened her since she first walked off the Normandy. She bit down on her lip, she refused to cry. She shook her head and took a deep breath in and slowly out, and pushed the tears down again.

She turned over and willed herself to sleep.

Later James was pinging her door again. "Goddammit." He opened it. He walked in with her evening meal, and saw she was asleep on the bed. He shook his head in disgust and walked over to her desk. Even before he opened the lunch meal he knew she hadn't touched it. He threw the other container down and walked over to her bed, looking down at her. He studied her for a minute. She was pale, getting gaunt. She barely ate anything since she had been there. When he had first seen her on the prison transport ship she was quiet, but strong, defiant, and he'd admired that. Now she was crumpled up on the bed, fragile, giving up.

"Hey." He jostled her. "Hey!"

She woke up and looked up at him confused, "What, what do you want?"

He shook his head, "Look, you've got to eat something, this is ridiculous."

She kicked his arm out of the way and turned over, "Leave me alone."

Vega grabbed her arm and leg and yanked her out of bed, "Get up!"

"What the fuck-" she yelled, struggling.

He picked her up and in a few steps carried her over into her bathroom, her kicking and hitting at him the whole way. He dumped her down on the floor of the shower and turned the water on her.

"You stink, you haven't had a shower since you got here." He walked out of the room and closed the door behind him.

She sputtered and sat in the warm water, her clothes getting drenched. She stood up and kicked off her wet clothes and stood naked in the shower, stunned. After a minute, she started soaping off, her thoughts on punching that asshole as soon as she got out. She shampooed her hair and let the water wash the dirt and grime off. She turned off the water and grabbed a towel. She dried herself off and wrapped the towel around her. She walked out of her room into the living room area where Vega was standing in the kitchen drinking out of a glass. She marched up to him and grabbed the glass out of his hand and threw the water in his face. She threw the glass against the cabinets behind him, glass shattering everywhere, James holding his hands up and ducking reflexively. She turned and marched back to her quarters, closing the door behind her.

_Well, that's more like it._ James thought.

Back in her quarters, she let the towel fall and looked through her closet for the first time. Clothes were lined up neatly for her, cargo pants, shirts. Nondescript clothes. She sighed, she hadn't been out of military casuals in so long, she hated it. _Well, I can't go around naked_, she thought. She put on some underwear, a bra and pulled out a gray long-sleeved shirt and navy cargo pants. She picked up her towel and put it over the railing in her bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. She looked like shit and she knew it, and she didn't care. She grabbed a comb and worked it through her wet hair. She used a washcloth to scrunch water out of it and bring the curls out. She hung up the washcloth and turned back to the counter, brushing her teeth. She washed out the toothbrush and leaned against the counter, looking at herself in the mirror. She wondered what was happening to her crew for the 100th time since she'd arrived. She felt the tears start to well up and quickly pushed away from the counter and walked out of the bathroom. She walked out to the living room and saw James sitting on the couch watching a vid. She frowned, she'd hoped he wouldn't be out there. She looked towards the fridge and walked in the kitchen. She stopped short when she saw broken glass on the ground.

"Broom's in the closet." Vega's voice called out to her.

"I'm not cleaning this shit up." she said.

He turned around on the couch to face her. "The hell you aren't. What do you think, I'm your fucking slave? You made that mess, you clean it up. You're not some damn princess, you're a soldier. Don't forget that." And he turned back around.

Shepard grit her teeth, but was silent. She went over to the closet and got the broom, cleaning up the broken pieces as best she could, then using wet paper towels to finish getting smaller pieces up. She sat on the floor and picked up a large shard of glass out of the trash can and carefully examined it, considering what she could do with it to herself. She looked up to see Vega looking down at her. "Need any help?"

She threw it in the trash. "No, I've got it taken care of." She got up and put the remaining supplies away. She went over to the fridge and got some juice out. She looked over at Vega, "I am allowed this, right?" she said, annoyed.

He nodded. She took a drink of it and looked him squarely in the eye. She wasn't going to let him drive her out of her living quarters. He worked here, he could leave when his shift was over and go out into the city, she couldn't. He turned and sat back down on the couch. She went to her quarters and got the dinner he had left her. She brought it to the kitchen and heated it up. She sat at the counter and ate.

"Don't you have any work to do?" she asked him.

"This is my work." He replied.

She snorted, "What, sitting on your ass watching vids?"

"Yup, pretty much."

She shook her head. "Don't you have a vidscreen you can watch movies in the guard room?"

"Nope." He said.

"I can't believe you don't have anything else to do." She said in annoyance. She continued to eat, stabbing the food with her fork and shoving it in her mouth.

He started to get frustrated and turned back to look at her, "Well, after I made you dinner and cleaned up the mess I made, I'm taking a break."

"You cooked this?" she asked, surprised.

"Yea, I did. Tastes good, huh?"

She looked down at her plate, "Yea, it's okay."

"Must be really good for you to eat like a cerdo."

She held the fork mid-air, "Like a what?"

"Cerdo. Look it up. Give you something to do."

"You're an asshole, you know that?" she threw the fork in the dishwasher and threw out the container.

He shrugged, "I've been called worse."

"What kind of prison guard are you?" she stood by the counter, hand on one hip.

"Don't know, I've never done this before. Anderson recruited me to be your personal guard."

"Anderson?" she was shocked.

"Yup. He came to Omega to bring me here to be your guard. It's pretty much only me, I live here. I can have a relief guard if I call, but he wants me to be here to watch over you."

She furrowed her brows and made a face. It didn't make sense, why would Anderson choose this guy? She looked up at him. "Well, Vega, is it?"

He nodded.

"Vega, let's get one thing straight. You pull a stunt like that again," she pointed in the direction of her shower, "and I'll break your arm."

He got up off the couch and folded his massive arms across his chest and stood in front of her, smirking. "You go without changing clothes or showering for 5 days and I'll be forced to do the same thing again. I mean, who does that? What the hell?"

She felt her throat clench and suddenly tears streamed down her face. She looked up at Vega unflinchingly and choked out, "I didn't want to wash the dust of the Normandy off me forever." She turned and went to her quarters, angrily wiping tears off her cheeks. She closed the door behind her and stood with her back to the door. She was mad she had allowed him to see her cry like that. Now that the tears had started, she couldn't stop them, and the events of the past week couldn't be pushed away any more. She leaned over and sobbed.

Vega stood in the living room, stunned at her confession. He leaned against the back of the couch and rubbed his hand through his short mohawk. He walked over to her door and heard her crying on the other side. He thought about going in there, but decided to give her privacy. _ I've pushed her far enough_, he thought.

The next morning Vega was surprised by the sight of her rifling through the fridge. She'd gotten up before him, and her hair was wet and freshly showered. He smiled.

"What's for breakfast?" he asked.

She shot him a look and continued getting ingredients for a shake. "Whatever you want to fix for yourself." She piled it on the counter and pulled out the blender.

He shook his head and moved past her to get some eggs out. Soon he was mixing ingredients in a pan, stealing a glance at her. Her eyes were still a bit red and puffy, but overall, she seemed to be over the worst of last night.

He cleared his throat, "About yesterday, Commander-"

She cut him off, "Not talking about it. I do have a few things I need, though. I'm going to need a computer with intranet access and email, access to a gym and somewhere to run. Could you help me with that?"

"Uh, I'll contact Anderson. See what we can do."

"Good. And don't call me Commander." She turned back and started the blender. She poured the drink into a glass and drank it. Vega turned back to the stove and continued cooking his eggs. Shepard finished her drink, then cleaned up the blender.

"So, now what?" she said looking at him.

"What do you mean?" James plated his eggs.

"I mean, what do I do now?"

He let out a huff of air, "You're in prison, you don't have to do anything."

She tightened her lips and processed that for a moment. She had spent so many years working hard, fighting hard, no time even for much of a personal life. Now in her prime, she was discarded to a tortuous free-time existence? Her thoughts raced.

"You could wash my pan if you want." James handed it to her.

She glared at him and walked away to sit on the couch. "Please contact Anderson as soon as you can."

James shook his head and silently ate his breakfast. After cleaning it up, he could feel her eyes boring into him so he decided to do as she asked and email Anderson. He went across the living room and punched in the code to his quarters and went inside. As he wrote the email to Anderson, he wondered the same thing Shepard had the day before, why had he wanted him to have this assignment? Anderson had gone to a lot of trouble to get him there. What was so special about him? The vidfeed of her quarters caught his eye as he saw her in her quarters doing pushups_. Maybe he figured I'm the only one who could handle her,_ he thought ruefully. He sent the email with her requests. He looked at the intranet news for a while, then downloaded some new vids, things she thought she might like. He looked over at the vidfeed. She was doing situps now. He sighed and got up from his desk.

Later that night, they both sat in the living room watching a vid she had chosen from the new ones he'd gotten. James woke up to an empty room and the vid on loop. He checked his omni-tool, it was about 1 am. _She must have gone to bed_. He got up and turned off the vid, walking towards his quarters. He punched in the code, and stopped short as he walked in on Shepard sitting at his desk looking on his computer.

"What the fuck are you doing!"

"Looking on the intranet for information on the Reapers. What does it look like I'm doing?" she had taken one of his datapads and was typing on it.

He shook his head in disbelief, "How did you get in here?'

"I watched you put the code in, it's not rocket science." She said.

"Turn it off NOW." He slammed his hands down in front of her.

She glared up at him and turned it off. "Fine." She started to walk away, and Vega grabbed her arm.

"Don't touch me." She said through gritted teeth, raising her fist.

"You're not leaving with that datapad."

She put her fist down, "I wiped the memory first. It's only public info on it. How do you expect me to do any work without anything to document on? You going to get me paper and pencils?"

He let go of her arm and sat down on his chair. "Jesus Christ, it's like looking after a teenager."

She stood in front of him and crossed her arms. "You forget who you're talking to, Lieutenant. I'm a Commander, a Spectre, and I'm older than you, by the way."

"Then fucking act like it! Hacking into my quarters-"

"I didn't hack, I just observed the code." She interrupted.

"Whatever, and entering my quarters and using my computer can get you put into solitary confinement. Is that what you want? You want a 10 by 10 cell with a cot and a toilet? Forget no intranet and no gym, your gym will be your concrete floor. Dammit Shepard, you're mad you're here, I get it, but don't be stupid." He pointed his finger at her face.

She clenched her jaw and silently handed the datapad back to him.

"That's better. I'll keep it in the drawer for you. I don't think it will be a problem to get you a computer, but it may take a few days. Try not to screw it up, okay?"

She narrowed her eyes at him.

He stood up and opened the door. "I'm changing the code. Don't do that again, or I'll have to report it."

She huffed past him and back towards her quarters. James put both hands to his head, _Damn, she is a lot to handle._ He was starting to believe his theory about why Anderson chose him to be her guard.

The next few days were a bit smoother, and Vega was able to get her a computer and time scheduled at the track and the gym after hours with him accompanying her. She worked out like a beast, it impressed him. She was equally intense about her research and work she was doing.

He had just entered his personal quarters a week later, when Shepard walked in behind him. "Vega, I need you to send this message out for me."

He turned, "Shepard, you're not supposed to be in here."

"Whatever, here, will you do it for me?" she handed him a data chip.

He looked down at it and sighed. He was never a letter of the law kind of guy, but she really pushed the envelope. She made her own rules.

"Who's it going to?"

"Sorry, it's classified."

Vega laughed, "Classified? Really? I could open this now and see what's in it."

"Go ahead, you won't have any idea what it's about. Just do me this favor and send it out, would you? But you have to do it outside the prison." She looked at him expectantly.

"Vega, it's important, or I wouldn't ask you. It's not escape plans, it's information to help with my work. I am trying to help defeat the Reapers, even if no one supports me doing it. I'm not going to stop." Her face was angry, but her eyes were pleading. He could hear a small amount of desperation in her voice.

"Who is it going to?" he watched Shepard shake her head. "Look, you have to at least tell me that."

She rolled her eyes, then looked back at Vega. "It's encrypted, but it's going to the Shadow Broker."

He laughed, "You're shitting me? I'm not sending a message to the Shadow Broker." He handed the data chip back to her.

She refused to take it, "The Shadow Broker is a former member of my crew, Vega. Above reproach. Look, I'm not going to ask you to do anything that would put you in jeopardy, okay?"

He raised his eyebrows, a member of her crew? He looked at her trying to decide if she was lying to him. If she was telling him the truth, that's information very few people knew and she was trusting him. He let out a long breath. "Fine. I'll go out tonight and send it."

She breathed a sigh of relief, "Thanks. I appreciate it." She gave him a small smile. The first he'd seen since she'd been there.

He put the chip on his desk and Shepard looked over and saw the other computer screens on. "What is that?" she asked and got closer. "Those weren't on the other night."

She saw the image of her empty bedroom on the screen and it dawned on her. He had vidfeed of her bedroom. "Are you fucking kidding me!" she spun around and slapped Vega across his face. He fought the reflex to hit her back, looking at her face, red and furious. "You've been watching me all this time!"

"Yea, it's a damn prison, Shepard! And I'm your guard, what do you think I'm supposed to be doing?"

"The bathroom too?" her voice screeched.

"No, just your room."

She started pacing the small space around his room, thinking about all the times she walked around her room naked, getting dressed, crying. She put her hands on her face feeling completely exposed.

"I thought you knew, it never occurred to me you didn't, I'm sorry." Vega explained.

She snapped her head up and hit her fist on his shoulder. "Of course I didn't know, I'd spent a hell of a lot more time in my bathroom if I knew. I bet you've been enjoying the show too, haven't you!" she turned to look at the screen, her hair falling around her face.

"Not much of a show, if you ask me. Nothing I haven't seen before, Shepard."

She knew he was mad when he said it, but it still smarted. Was he saying she was unattractive? And why did she even care? She kept her eyes on the screen. "Sorry to have disappointed you, Vega." She seethed, and left his quarters.

He watched her leave and hung his head. No matter what happened, that was a low blow, and he knew it. Plus, it was the opposite of the truth. He quite enjoyed seeing her on the vidfeed and thought she was one of the sexiest women he'd ever seen. He looked up at the screen to see her look at the camera and give him the finger. Then she got a chair and put something over the camera so it was blacked out. He rubbed his Mohawk with his hand, dammit, he would have to go in there and remove it. The vidfeed wasn't recorded, but was periodically checked by the brass. He got dressed to go out, grabbed her data chip and went to her room, pinging her on the com. She opened the door and he walked in holding up the data chip, "I'm going to take care of this for you. Would you please remove that," he pointed to the towel over the camera, "so the relief guard won't report you."

She looked up from her desk and nodded.

Vega studied her for a moment. "What?" she asked.

"Just –" Vega started.

"Look, I get it, I'm a prisoner. I have to be watched. It just would have been nice to know, okay? Any other surprises I don't know about?"

James shook his head no and turned to leave. He stopped in her doorway and turned back, "Is there anything you want me to get you in the city, any special foods or any, I don't know, anything?"

Shepard thought about it. This was an unexpected olive branch he was extending, considering she could see the faint red outline of her palm print on his cheek. "Well, I could use a bathrobe, knowing now I have to be more careful walking around in here. If you have the time, I mean."

Vega smiled, "I'll see what I can do."

Shepard worked for a few hours, then made herself some dinner. It was nice being there alone for once. She could pretend for a minute this was her apartment. She looked around. It really was a cushy prison. She needed to make sure she didn't screw it up. She smiled, thinking how she would never admit to Vega he was right about that. She thought about how he was helping her out that night. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all. She made a decision to be a little less hard on him. She ate her meal and cleaned up, turning on the vidscreen and sorting through the choices.

Her attention was turned to voices outside her door. She turned the volume down and looked behind her at the door. It was open now, she could hear Vega's voice, and a female voice. She couldn't identify what they were saying, but she could hear the female giggling. Her eyes narrowed to slits, _What was this going on?_ She could barely make out Vega say, "I've got to go." And the female voice say something in return. He fully opened the door and rushed in.

"Hey, Shepard. Took care of that message for you. And I got you this." He handed her a big bag.

She stood impassively with her arms crossed in front of her chest. "Who was that?"

Vega looked confused, "What are you talking about?" He could see her angry expression.

She pointed at the door, "That woman, I could hear her. Is that your girlfriend, James?" she raised her eyebrows.

He gave her a perplexed grin, "No, I don't have a girlfriend. She's one of the other guards here. We were just talking. I do have a private life, Shepard."

"Of course, I just, I heard someone and just wanted to know who it was, that's all." She turned crimson.

Vega was intrigued by her reaction. "Well, here's the bathrobe you asked for. I hope you like it."

She took the bag he still offered her and opened it. She pulled out a fluffy pink bathrobe. "It's nice, thank you. Pink?" she questioned.

He laughed, "I thought you needed a little feminine touch."

She bit her lip. "Right, thanks."

He frowned, he felt like he had insulted her again by accident. "I mean, you'd look good in pink." Ugh, he was making it worse.

"Okay. Thanks James."

"Sure."

She left for her quarters and he went to his room, mulling over the events of the last minute. She probably needed some other human contact besides him. Maybe some of her crew could come visit her. She did seem very close to them, from the few comments she'd made. He'd contact Anderson about it. He got ready for bed and turned in. He lay down on his bed and stretched his arms up over his head, thinking about the night's events. _ Wait – had she called him James?_

The next few weeks went by with them settling into a routine. James had brought a pack of cards, which led to some heated poker games at night. When Shepard was with the gang on Earth she had learnt to play, and she found those skills hadn't left her. One day he walked in and announced he had gotten them time in the combat simulators.

"No way, don't mess with me Vega."

"It's true – we can get ready and go now if you want."

"Fuck yeah!" she dropped her datapad on the table and ran to her quarters. She tied up her hair and changed into her gym clothes in the bathroom. She ran out and gave James a broad smile as he waited for her at the door. He was surprised by the intensity of her joy at being able to go to the combat sims.

They walked down the hall and made their way across the building to the elevator. They stopped at a floor and two soldiers started to enter, then seeing Shepard inside, balked. "No, we'll take the next one." One of them looked away, the other stared her down, hands across his chest. James angrily punched the button for the elevator to start again and looked over at Shepard.

"Ignore them, pendajos."

She looked up at him, "Oh, I don't give a shit. They don't define me." She shrugged and got off the elevator as the doors opened. James thought she would be hurt by their reaction, but her strength impressed him. He could see how she became the legend she was. They walked towards the simulators, James leading the way. He continued to think about her, her drive, her focus. If she wasn't such a pain in the ass, he'd probably like her.

Soon they were getting dressed in armor provided to Alliance soldiers and picking up practice guns. He watched as she smiled and held the weapon in her hand. She grasped her fingers around it like it was an old lover, "Come on, let's go." She walked over to the starting point. James stood by the start button on the spike. "You ready Shepard?"

She stood up straighter and yelled to him, "Fuck, I was born ready. Punch it!" They fought together for nearly an hour, different types of enemies, battles. He'd seen her work out like a beast, now he was seeing how she fought, like no one he'd ever seen before. She was lighting fast and quick with her tech attacks. She had a sixth sense about what was going on around her and could quickly turn to take out enemies flanking her.

The simulators stopped and Shepard stood up breathless, hand on her hip, other hand holding the weapon in the air. James was entranced by the sight. Suddenly he saw the Commander from the vids, the one who had accomplished so much, inspired so many.

"What's the matter, Vega? Never seen a Spectre in action before?" she grinned.

"Not bad for an old lady."

She snorted, "Old lady? I might be older, but that doesn't mean old. How old are you, anyway?" She walked over to the weapons table and turned off her weapon.

"I'm 25. Actually, 26 as of yesterday."

Her eyes widened, "What? Twenty-six? You're just a baby. Was it your birthday yesterday or something?"

"Yea."

"Well, we should celebrate." She leaned in to him and lowered her voice, "Bring something for us to drink to your birthday tonight."

James nodded. They took off the armor and walked back towards their quarters. Along the way they ran into more soldiers in the hall. Most of them ignored them, but Shepard heard one say as they passed, "I guess it takes a traitor to guard a traitor."

She stopped dead in her tracks and turned around. Before James could stop her she walked up to the guy who had made the comment, smirking at her and she spat in his face. He looked back at her shocked, Shepard saying, "Say anything you want about me, but leave him out of it you son of a bitch!"

By now James had ran up to get between them and the guy's friend was pulling him away. Shepard stood her ground as people stopped and watched the scene play out before them, but it was soon over. The soldier turned and left with his friend and James turned to Shepard and held her by the shoulders, "Let's go," he said firmly. She nodded and turned with him and they walked in silence back to their quarters.

When they entered, Shepard paced around angrily. "How dare he, what the fuck is his problem?"

James shook his head, "I didn't expect you to defend my honor, Shepard."

She stopped, "Well, I just, he was completely out of line."

"Not entirely. There's a story behind it, but it's not something I like to talk about."

She huffed, "Whatever it is, whatever he was talking about, I'm sure you did the right thing. We all have to make tough choices. I mean, shit, that's what got me into this mess." She motioned around her. She sat down on the couch and pointed at him, "I know you Vega, you're no traitor. You're an honest, loyal guy. You didn't deserve that."

He sat on the couch across from her and looked at her, amazed at her support. "I didn't know you were such a fan, Shepard."

She turned a little pink. "Just stating the facts, Vega. Now, how about getting us something to celebrate with tonight? I'm going to go clean up."

"Sure, you know, I think I'll pick up some Chinese food too. What do you think?"

"Yea, that'd be great."

Later that night they had eaten the food and were well on their way to finishing the bottle of tequila he'd picked up. She hated the taste of tequila, but she wasn't going to let him drink her under the table. They laughed and talked and bragged about their battle prowess. Shepard stood up, "I could take you, Vega." She held up her fists.

He laughed, "Seriously, I'm not going to fight you Shepard."

"What, you chicken?" she took a jab at him.

He felt the hit, but continued to hold his hands up in protest, "No, just don't want to hurt you."

She scoffed, "Give me a break, you couldn't if you tried." She took a few more hits at him, one solid one on his jaw. He backed up, "Look, this is a bad idea."

She put her hands down, disappointed, "You know, I sparred with Garrus and Thane on the Normandy. They didn't pull their punches."

"He was the Drell assassin, right?"

"Yup." She brought up her fists again, "and I beat him, too." She kicked his leg out from under him and he fell to the ground. She got another punch in and backed off.

James wiped the blood from his mouth and held up his fists, "It's on."

She grinned as he came towards her and took a few swipes at her, but she was too fast and dodged them, getting a kidney punch in. James was surprised at how strong her punches were, even for as much as she worked out. He grabbed her from behind and wrestled her to the ground. She struggled, then suddenly her voice changed and she screamed out in pain. He immediately let go and helped her up, "Are you okay? I'm sorry!"

"Yea, just hurt my wrist a little bit. Come on, let's go." She brought up her fists again.

James stared at her, "Are you crazy, no way."

"Vega, it takes a lot more than that to bring me down."

"I think we've both had way too much to drink. I'm heading to bed, and so should you."

Shepard brought her hands down, her head was starting to throb, not to mention her wrist. "Okay. That was fun though, Vega. Happy birthday again."

James started picking up the glasses and drinks, "Thanks Shepard. So how old are you, anyway?"

Shepard wrinkled up her nose, "I'm 32."

He stood up, "Hmm."

"What does that mean, 'Hmm'?"

"Well, it means you look pretty good for an old lady."

"Are you flirting with me, James?" she put her hand on her hip.

"Are you calling me James?" he leaned down over her.

She lost her voice for a second. "I think we've had too much to drink." She said finally.

"Yup." James went to the kitchen and put the glasses in the sink.

She walked a little unsteadily back to her quarters and went to her bathroom. She decided playing around with James was playing with fire, he could definitely out-play her. She gripped her wrist, it was really starting to smart. She used the toilet and then stumbled out and into her bed.

The next morning James was up in the kitchen making eggs. Shepard came out of her quarters, a pained expression on her face.

He laughed, "Hangover, Shepard? I've got the best cure for that," he reached for a drink he'd made on the counter.

"Ugh, no, James. I'm not that much of a lightweight. It's my wrist." She held it up. It was swollen to twice its normal size.

"Oh, damn. I'm going to have to take you to the doctor."

"Yea, I think it's broken."

"Can you move it?" he walked over and held it in his hand. He gently tried to lift her hand.

"Stop!" she yelled. "Shit. It's broken. What a pain in the ass."

"Geez, Shepard, I'm really sorry."

She sighed, "James, it's okay. It was an accident. I'll eat first, then we'll go to the med ward."

James nodded and gave her some of the eggs he made. He smiled to himself, she was still calling him James.

After they ate, they went down to the medical ward and she was brought into a private examination room. James stood by as the doctor scanned her wrist. "It's broken. I'll be able to set it externally and put some hardware on the outside you'll need to wear for 2 weeks. Then we'll re-examine it and see if we can take it off. How'd you do that?"

"Combat simulators. Fell on it." Shepard said.

The doctor nodded. He got to work on her wrist, James watching from the side of her hospital bed. After he finished getting the hardware on, she started to get up off the bed.

"Not so fast, Shepard. You never had a check-up when you got here, we have to complete a thorough examination before you leave today, you're overdue." He brought up his omni-tool, "I'm calling for a specialist to come and check out your implants. They aren't what we usually see."

Shepard sat back on the hospital bed. She took a deep sigh.

"Please undress." The doctor called for a nurse on his omnitool.

"Um, I'll go." James started for the door.

"No, it's prison protocol for you to be present." The doctor stopped James.

"It's okay, Vega. I can handle it." Shepard took her boots off, then stood up and took her shirt, then her pants off. She stood in her underwear. She was used to military life, there wasn't much room for modesty.

The nurse entered the room. He walked over to the doctor and assisted getting the instruments ready. "Lopez will be in here in 5 minutes to check her implants, doctor."

The doctor nodded, then turned to look at Shepard, "No, you need to take everything off, we have to have full access to your implants."

Shepard took a deep breath, and started taking off her bra. James wanted to disappear, but he leaned against the wall and folded his arms over his chest and looked at the floor.

Completely naked, she sat back on the table. She could sense James' discomfort. "Don't worry Vega, it's not a big deal. Not much of a show, right?"

His own words coming back at him made James even more uncomfortable, as he tried to look anywhere but at her.

"Okay. Let's begin." The doctor scanned her all over, then asked her to lay back on the table. She lay back and looked up at the ceiling, seeing James out of her peripheral vision. She was furious at having to be laid out like a specimen for all her flaws to be seen. She knew he'd seen her on the vid feed, but this was way closer. She couldn't hide any of her scars, her wounds. She was mad she even cared at all. She should be glad he saw how damaged she really was.

The doctor went back to his datapad, inputting information. He conferred with his nurse. Shepard looked up at James who had his hand over his eyes, looking down at the floor.

"Geez, Vega, I know you said I was a pig, but it can't be that bad." She said.

James snapped his head up, "What are you talking about? I never called you a pig!"

"Yes you did, the first week, remember? Cerdo, I looked it up, it means pig."

"Oh, that, I said you ate like a pig, I never said you were a pig. Big difference."

"Oh, well now you see how ugly I truly am. An ugly, scarred up soldier."

"Lola, I –"

The doctor came back to her bed, interrupting them. "You're basically very healthy. I'm going to check out your organs and then we're expecting our tech expert." He scanned up and down her torso, then went and talked to the nurse, who came back and put a sheet over her temporarily.

"You've got 80% lung function, one kidney and-" he hesitated.

"I know all that already, doctor." She rolled her eyes.

"Well, your ovaries, they aren't functioning either. You're infertile."

"Yes, yes, doctor. I know. I've also got a metal joint in my shoulder. None of this is news to me, so I'm basically okay, right?"

He nodded. The door opened and a woman walked in. She introduced herself as Lopez the tech expert and took out her equipment. She started scanning her at her head. She took off the sheet and continued scanning, inputting numbers and recalibrating some of the implants. Shepard jumped. "I'm sorry, is that uncomfortable?"

"No, just a jolt, that's all. I've been through far worse, doctor."

"Yes, I can see that. You're a true survivor." She continued to scan, putting the sheet back over her torso as she continued down to her legs.

James looked down at her, now that she was mostly covered. He could see the scars on her shoulder, they looked brutal. She had bullet wounds, gouge scars and faint orange lines. He'd noticed them before on her lower legs, but he had no idea they were so pervasive on her torso. He looked up at her face to see her looking back at him.

"I told you." She said simply.

He drew in a sharp breath. He had no idea how extensive her injuries were, the technology holding her together. He felt sick thinking about the sparring they did last night, and now she had a metal brace on her wrist because of him.

"Finished. That should help, Shepard. If you have any further problems with the implants, have them let me know, and I can come to your quarters and take care of it."

"Thank you. I appreciate it."

The doctor left and Shepard started to get up from the table, holding the sheet around her front. James got a good look at her back and saw even more scars. She wasn't kidding. The vidfeed was not detailed enough to show all that, and she never wore less than a T-shirt. However, he couldn't help but see past the scars to the beauty beneath. Her shape, her breasts, he hadn't tried to see them, but couldn't really help it. He took a deep breath.

"Wait, I have to do a gynecological exam." The doctor said.

"Dios mio, I don't think I can handle that." James said.

Shepard turned and glared at him, "You're not leaving me alone with these doctors. Turn around if you have to." She laid back down on the bed and propped her legs up on the table.

James took her suggestion and turned around to face the wall.

The exam was quick, with the doctor again assuring her everything was normal. She jumped up off the table and the nurse handed her her clothes. As she got dressed, she asked, "How often do I have to go through this?"

"Twice a year. You're good for another 6 months."

"Okay doctor. I guess I'll be seeing you in 2 weeks to re-check this." She held up her wrist.

By now James had turned around and Shepard was fully dressed, waiting by the door for him. They left the examination room and made their way out to the hallway and started walking back to their quarters.

"Damn, Shepard, I'm sorry you had to go through all that."

She shrugged, "It's the price you pay for coming back from the dead."

James had forgotten about that, but after seeing all her injuries he really appreciated her strength, physical and emotional.

They walked in silence, Shepard sneaking a sideways glance at him. "I tried to tell you I was a Frankenstein. I hide it pretty well, but, it's who I am. I can't change it."

James shot her a look as he punched in the code to their quarters. They walked in.

He walked over to her, "Look, stop talking about yourself that way. Plenty of people are injured and have cybernetics, implants and scars. So you've got a few more than other people, so what. You've done more than a hundred people have done in a lifetime, that's what counts."

She was shocked. He went over to the fridge and pulled out some ice. He put it in a bag and handed it to her. "This is old school, but it works. Put this on your wrist to keep the swelling down." He walked out and into his quarters.

She did as he instructed and sat on the couch. She had felt humiliated by laying naked in front of him, and he reacted pretty much how she thought he would. She saw the shock on his face. He respected her, but was repulsed by her. She felt a few tears spill down. Dammit. She got up and went to her bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror. She used to be prettier, she thought. The stress and strain of the last few weeks definitely showed. Plus, how much effort was she even putting into herself lately? Pretty much none. She shook her head. Even if just for her own well-being, she decided to try and look like her old self.

She went back to her computer and started searching the extranet. She tried to order some toiletries and makeup but ruefully realized she didn't have a credit chit to place the order. She downloaded the order on a data chip to give to James. She got up from her desk and decided to at least try to put her hair together. Her usual bun had partly come undone in a frizzy mess. She took the band out and tried to comb her long messy curls. Her hair was long, almost to her waist, and using her non-dominant hand was tricky. She made pretty good work of it, then tried to twist it up several times unsuccessfully. The brace on her right wrist made this easy task difficult. Grunting in frustration, she walked back to the living room, grabbing her data chip on the way.

James came out of his quarters after his shower and nearly ran into Shepard outside his door. "Here," she said, giving him a data chip, "I need to order some private toiletries, so if you could upload this for approval, I'd appreciate it."

"Sure, Shepard. No problem." He eyed her, something was different. He noticed the hairbrush in her other hand. Her hair was down, long and wavy down her back. He'd never seen her like that, she always wore it up. Even in all the vids, she never had it down. He was struck by how soft it made her look, more feminine.

"Uh, I need your help with this too." She said reluctantly.

"Huh, what?"

"My hair, with this brace I can't put it up. If you could help me." She walked away towards her quarters and in her bathroom.

James followed her as she stood in front of her mirror. "I can get it pretty much up," she said as she took it with one hand and started to twist it, "but then I can't get the band around it." It fell out of her hand.

"Let me help you with it," James said and took the brush. He started brushing her hair from the bottom, working up to her scalp. He pulled it back in a ponytail. "Your hair is curly, why don't you let it down like this?"

Shepard frowned, "It gets in the way."

He looked at her in the reflection in the mirror, "Then why don't you keep it short like most soldiers?"

"Well, I, I don't know. I find it just as easy to keep it long."

James worked his fingers through her hair, "But it must be difficult to keep it under your helmet."

She flushed slightly, "It's not a big deal. Just put it in a bun for me, would you?"

"You should leave it out, it would look better."

She shot him a look in the mirror. "James –" she said exasperatedly.

"Okay, here I'll braid it for you."

She raised her eyebrows, "You know how to do that?"

"Sure."

"Um, okay."

He brushed her hair and divided it into sections and started braiding it down.

"I have to ask, how'd you learn how to braid hair?"

"When I was a kid I had friends who had older sisters. They taught me. I never forgot." He continued making the braid down her back.

"Your secret's safe with me."

James laughed, "I'm confident in my Marine masculinity."

Shepard watched him in the mirror, his strong arms and hands carefully and gently working her hair, then wrapping the band around the bottom of the braid. She studied him as he focused on her hair. His nearness was strangely comforting.

"There. All done. How's that?"

She turned around and looked at her back in the mirror, running her hand down her tight braid.

"I can't remember the last time I wore it like that." She turned around to face him. "Thanks, that'll keep it out of my face."

They stood for a moment, a subtle change perceptible to both of them. "Sure, anytime Shepard."

A few days later they were walking in the halls towards their quarters after a workout at the gym. Shepard was allowed to wear regular gym clothes as long as James was with her, so as not to attract attention. It was James' and Anderson's idea to allow her to go out to the gym instead of have gym equipment installed in her quarters. They knew she needed to get out of her quarters and interact with other people, even if from a distance to keep her from falling into the deep hole of depression that threatened to swallow her the first week she was there.

James was stopped by a higher ranking officer, "Vega, can I speak to you for a moment?" he asked.

James nodded, and Shepard stood by. "Could you excuse us for a moment, Shepard?" the officer turned to her.

Shepard nodded, surprised, and walked down the hall out of earshot. She watched them talk, the officer talking, James mostly nodding. She looked the other direction down the hall and considered what would happen if she suddenly took off. As much as the idea appealed to her, the consequences did not. She knew she wouldn't get far, she'd probably end up in the solitary that James had threatened her with. She'd disappoint Anderson. She'd probably never see James again, and suddenly she had a big problem with that thought. She sighed. As much as her gang instincts told her to run, she knew that was the dumbest thing she could do. She turned back to look at James who was walking towards her now.

"What was that all about?" she looked up at him and asked.

"Can't talk about it." He said, and they started to walk down the hall.

She turned away and rolled her eyes. "Whatever." Probably mundane prison procedure or some crap. He probably forgot to clock in or something. She smiled, then looked ahead at a group of upper brass and stopped dead in her tracks, stunned. In the group of officers heading their way was Kaidan Alenko. He was talking to another officer next to him. He hadn't seen her yet. She looked around in a panic, there was nowhere to go. By now James had realized she was not with him and had turned around back to where she was, "Come on, let's go," he said.

She looked around frantically, there was a closet door on the wall by them. She grabbed his arm, "Shit, come here!" and pulled him to the door, his back against it. She looked up at him, "Just, just pretend we're together!" She hugged him, turning her face away from Kaidan's group. James started to push her away, "What the hell?"

She looked up at him, "Please, I can't let him see me." And she reached up to his face and kissed him. Surprised, James let her kiss him as he saw the group of officers walking by them. He didn't know what she was upset about, but it was not uncommon to see soldiers in the large complex embrace like this when one was about to be shipped out. She turned her head and deepened her kiss, as James cupped her face with his hands in an attempt to further hide her face. She pulled back slightly, "Are they gone?" James looked up, they were gone around the corner. "Not yet," he lied. He leaned down and kissed her again, this time snaking his tongue inside her mouth. She readily opened her mouth and returned with her own. She leaned against him, James putting his arm around her waist pulling her in tighter. He suddenly pulled away, "Coast is clear."

She turned around and saw the hallway was empty. "Thanks, damn that was close." She let go of him and backed up.

He looked down and saw how pale her face was and the look of fear in her eyes. "What was that all about?" he asked.

She started to walk again, James beside her. "That was my ex-boyfriend."

James was shocked, "Really? Which one?"

"The one who apparently has been promoted to Major." She huffed.

James shook his head, he hadn't gotten a good look at anyone in the group.

Shepard kept walking, talking angrily, "I didn't want him seeing me as a prisoner, gloating about it, feeling sorry for me, whatever, I didn't want to give him the satisfaction. Thanks, James for helping me out." She gave him a sideways glance. "You didn't even know what it was about, but you helped me. I – I really appreciate it."

"Well, sure, I mean, no problem Shepard."

"Oh, and nice tongue action, Lieutenant. I enjoyed that." She walked past him and punched the code in for their quarters. James stood outside their quarters, _This woman will be the death of me,_ he thought. _And – wait, when did she figure out the code to the door?_

In his quarters that night James went over the events of that day. She hadn't said any more about her ex-boyfriend, and he didn't dare bring it up. He knew her kissing him had been a tactical move to avoid being seen, but how much he'd enjoyed it had been a big shock to him. She was getting under his skin, and he wasn't sure how he felt about it.

The next day James brought a delivery box to her, after it was scanned by prison security. She took it into her room and took out the hair products and makeup she had ordered a few days ago, and after an hour of messing around with it all, looked at herself and recognized the old Shepard. She smiled. She didn't realized how much she missed her natural curls and red lipstick. It had been her signature on the Normandy. She remembered how Joker had teased her about it. She walked out of her room into the living room.

Vega stopped mid-drink and watched her transfixed. "Wow, Lola. You look like yourself on the vids." He pointed with his drink to her hair, "and those curls, I told you they'd look good down."

She grinned, "I wanted to feel more like my old self. Just because I'm here doesn't mean I'm going to let it defeat me."

"Now, that's the Shepard I knew was in there." He smiled back at her.

"By the way, who's Lola?"

"What?" James swallowed hard.

"You called me Lola. You did the same thing the other day at the doctor's office. What's that all about?"

"Oh, it's just an old friend of mine's sister. You remind me of her."

"Really? Like how?"

"She was a real pain in the ass."

She rolled her eyes and went to the fridge.

The next few days went on with their usual routine with the added issue of them bickering about her wrist. Him trying to get her to slow down, and her pushing it. Finally he convinced her that if she didn't take care of it, she would end up having the brace on for longer than two weeks, maybe even surgery.

Shepard was in the shower when she heard James call for her from the other room. She got out and dried off quickly, putting on the bathrobe he'd gotten her. She was scrunching her hair in the towel and walking out of the room when she was thunderstruck by seeing Garrus standing in the kitchen talking to James.

"Oh my god, Garrus!" she dropped the towel and ran over to him. She threw her arms around his neck and wrapped her legs around his waist. He chuckled and held her up by one hand around her bottom, the other holding her around her back, tangling his talons in her wet curls.

"Jane, it's so good to see you." He leaned back and looked at her, then back over her shoulder again to embrace her tighter.

James was stunned. He knew she was close to Garrus, she'd told him a few stories about her crew, but she was obviously closer to him than he'd realized, and it bothered him. Her robe was open, her naked body pressed against him. James frowned.

They embraced a few moments longer, Shepard telling Garrus how much she missed him, how glad she was he came to see her. She finally let go and stood on the ground, pulling her robe back around her. "Oh, I got you wet!" she laughed, and Garrus looked down at his casuals, soaked in the front from her wet body pressed against him.

James was furious, feeling a heat climb up his face and over his ears, but he knew it was irrational. He was protective towards her, he supposed.

"Better watch out, Jane, Kaidan will be jealous."

She blushed.

James noticed the blush. _Who is Kaidan? Is he the ex-boyfriend in the hall the other day, or another guy?_

"Screw Kaidan." She said.

"Well, you did actually." Garrus laughed.

She smirked, "Come on, let's go to my quarters." She led him off and James stood in the living room feeling awkward, not knowing what to do. He sat on the couch and waited.

Shepard motioned to the chair by her desk, "Grab that and follow me." She said and lead Garrus into her bathroom.

"Um, care to explain?" Garrus asked, putting the chair down next to Shepard as she sat on the edge of the tub.

"Oh, this is the only room that doesn't have vidfeed. We can have privacy."

Garrus nodded.

"Oh, Garrus, I can't tell you how good it is to see you." She got up and gave him another hug.

"How have you been? I see you're up to old tricks." He said pointing to the brace on her wrist.

She sat back on the tub edge again. "Oh, we were sparring and that happened." She said making a face.

They talked for a while, about what had happened since she was imprisoned. He told her most of the crew were staying on board with the Alliance repurposing the Normandy from a Cerberus ship.

"I'm on my way to Palaven. I've been offered a position to prepare for the Reaper attack, try to get our people as ready as we can."

"Wow, I'm glad someone is taking it seriously."

He updated her on the crew, those he knew about. "Kaidan is off the grid, Jane. I think he's been promoted."

She waived him off, "Yea, I know. I saw him the other day. He hasn't contacted me and I really don't care."

Garrus gave her a pointed look.

"It's true, Garrus. We're over. He completely devastated me on Horizon. His half-hearted apology just made things worse. I can't ever see him any differently."

"I can't say I'm sorry. I never thought he was good enough for you anyway."

She laughed, "Okay, big brother. Glad to see you're still looking out for me."

"We all take turns doing that. How's he working out?" Garrus motioned towards the door.

"James? He's doing a good job. Anderson picked him specifically. He's very protective. A little bit like you. He likes to nag me and push me into taking care of myself." She smiled.

"Good."

He stood up. "Well, I have to go, Shepard. I've stayed way past the allotted time. I don't want to get you in trouble. I know you find enough of that on your own."

"You know me too well, Garrus." She stood up and they walked out through her quarters and into the living area. James jumped up when he heard them coming out of her quarters. He'd tried not to imagine all the things they could have been doing in her bathroom.

Garrus walked over to the door, and James joined him, opening the door for him. "Take good care of her, Lieutenant." He shook James' hand.

"Wait!" Shepard ran over to him and hugged him again, hard. Garrus leaned over and took in her scent, trying to implant it in his memory. It never left him the two years his best friend had been left for dead, and he knew any goodbye could be final. She looked up at him, in tears.

"Sorry, Garrus."

He wiped a tear away from her cheek, "It's okay Jane. I'll miss you too. I'll send you emails, I've gotten your address from Vega."

She held his hand. "It meant the world to me to see you."

Garrus nodded, and left before she could see how upset he was as well. The door closed and she stood for a moment, wiping tears from her face. She looked over at James, grateful he had given Garrus her email address.

"So, are you fucking him?" James asked coolly.

Shock turned to rage and she kicked James in the shins, causing him to buckle over. "You son of a bitch!" she stormed off to her quarters. What the hell was his problem? Every time she started to think he was a nice guy he would do something like that. What a douchebag. Ugh. She tore off her bathrobe, at this point he'd seen her naked up close and personal, what difference did it make. She started to get dressed and put her underwear on. Suddenly her door opened.

"You know, I'm getting sick and tired of you hitting me like that." James growled.

She spun around, naked except for her underwear. She didn't care. "Oh yea, well I'm sick and tired of you talking down to me and making snide comments!"

He looked surprised.

"Oh come on!" she said, "Garrus is my best friend, and seeing him was obviously very emotional for me, and what do you say; 'Are you fucking him?', what the hell is wrong with you?"

"I was just asking."

"Really? What difference would it be if we were anyway, which we never have by the way, not that it's any of your business."

"Look, I didn't mean it like that-"

She was suddenly aware of the vidfeed and walked into her bathroom, James hot on her heels. She turned around and shoved him on his shoulder. "Don't disrespect me like that again, Vega. You've got no right!" she raised her voice.

"I just, I just-"

"Just what goddammit?" she looked at him. He looked down.

She turned away in a huff, her back to him. "I'm tired of you judging me, James."

He stepped over to her and put his hands on the back of her shoulders. She stiffened up and smacked his arm away with her good hand. "Just fuck off!"

He grabbed her by the waist, "Would you like that?" he growled at her, and pulled her close to him, her back pressed against his stomach. She gasped. Was he really going to spar with her now? She quickly realized she was wrong when she felt his hot kisses on her neck. She held onto his hand around her waist and leaned back against him. Suddenly his hands were all over her. The stimulation was overwhelming. He lifted her up and held her against him tighter. She couldn't believe this was really happening.

"So who's Kaidan, is he your boyfriend?" he demanded.

"Uh, yes, he was, we saw him last week." She could hardly think. He snaked his hand down the front of her panties, feeling down between her folds.

"Did you used to get wet for him?" he asked as he reached his finger in and pushed it in slightly. She panted, reeling in the sensation and arching her head back. He pushed his finger in more, "Did you used to get wet for him?" he asked roughly.

"Yes, yes." She cried out.

He pushed another finger in her and she gasped in pleasure. She reached her hand up behind her and grabbed the back of James' neck. He could feel her getting tighter around his fingers. "Don't you dare cum." he ordered.

She couldn't speak. Suddenly he pulled his hand out from her pants and threw her roughly on the floor of the bathroom. She sat on all fours, catching her breath. When she looked up, he had left the room.

James left her room and crossed over to his room, closing the door. He leaned against the door and held his face in his hands. He couldn't believe he had snapped like that. Seeing her with Garrus, hearing about this Kaidan guy, seeing her naked, he lost all control. He wanted her, more than anything he ever wanted in his life, but knew if he made it too easy he'd lose her. He had to be in control, she was in control of so much in her life, so much of his life, he instinctively knew he had to do that. He leaned against his door. Shit, he had been so blind with lust he hadn't thought about how she would react. She'd been wet, sure, but she could come back and say he'd tried to rape her. Dammit, he couldn't believe how she brought that animalistic part of him out. He had to get a grip on himself, apologize to her, whatever. He took a cold shower.

Shepard lay on the floor of the bathroom, breathing hard. "Son of a bitch," she said. She was in shock over the course of events. She had no idea he had feelings for her that way. She thought he thought she was ugly. Was he just mad at her and looking for a fuck? Well, he hadn't fucked her, had he. He had taken his frustrations out on her. He'd been jealous. She grinned. Angry sex was the best sex of all, and she liked it rough. She sat up. He was a welcome change from Kaidan's overly emotional, manipulative clinginess. The bedroom was one place she wanted a man to take charge. She let out a long breath, coming down off her high. Suddenly she frowned, realizing she was irritated he had stopped. Maybe he chickened out. Maybe he was trying to mess with her mind, make her beg for it. Hmmm, she could beg for it, and make him beg back. She jumped up and went to her room getting dressed. She went out into the living room and sat on the couch, putting on a vid.

James took his shower, and got caught up on his work. After a while, he couldn't keep hiding any longer, and he braced himself and walked out of his quarters. Shepard was in the kitchen looking in the fridge. She looked up at him, "Hey, are you going to make something for dinner, or do you want me to get myself a sandwich?" she looked at him calmly.

"Um, I can make something." James said, walking towards her.

"Great. I'll have some juice until then." She grabbed her glass from the counter and walked over to the couch to watch the vid.

He stood frozen in disbelief. She was acting like nothing happened. He didn't know what that meant, or what to do. While he processed it, he automatically went to the kitchen and started pulling out ingredients. Soon he had chicken and rice cooking.

"Mmm, that smells good James." She said.

He was incredulous. He'd expected a physical or verbal attack, or both, when he came out, and she wasn't doing either. Maybe she had some feelings for him too, even if just for sex. He stirred the rice on the stove. She had acted pretty jealous before when she heard him talking to the female guard outside their quarters.

He finished making the food, and called her over. She came over and sat on the stool and started eating the plate he'd made her. He ate next to her, quiet.

"This is good." She said.

He nodded. He cleared his throat, "I'm glad you like it."

She looked up at him, "Seems like you know what I like, James."

He refused to look at her and turned crimson. She smiled. She finished her dinner, then got up, "I'm going to turn in for the night. See you in the morning." And before he could say anything, she was in her room with the door closed behind her.

James looked at the closed door. He didn't know what to think about her reaction. She didn't seem mad. Maybe she was waiting to complain to the brass in the morning. He sighed. Well, if that was the case, he'd have to be honest. He'd crossed the line, and he would admit it and take the consequences. He cleaned up the plates and put the leftovers in the fridge. He went to his quarters for a sleepless night.

The next morning, Shepard was up early. James came out blearily, late, to find her in her gym clothes finishing off a shake.

"Hey, you'd better hustle." She said with annoyance.

"What? Why?"

"We have the combat sims reserved this morning. I'm not missing that for anything."

"Oh yeah, I forgot." He said and grabbed and energy bar. He peeled off the wrapper and ate, looking at Shepard staring at him.

"What?" he asked.

She snorted and shook her head, "Nothing." She was disappointed he had backed off from his aggressiveness yesterday. He'd ignited a fire in her and she didn't want it to burn out. She brushed her teeth in her bathroom and stood by the front door waiting for him to be ready to go. After a few minutes, he emerged again from his room. In their new routine she turned around so he could quickly braid her hair. James finished and said, "Okay, let's go."

They walked through the halls to the simulators, Shepard getting more frustrated as they walked. What was all that yesterday? He'd gotten her all hot and bothered, acted like a jealous lover, then ran away like a frightened school boy. She'd thought he might have come to her room that night or that morning, something. Dammit. She walked faster, feeling more and more the urge to kill something.

They fought hologeth in the sims, Shepard getting more and more physical, jumping, lunging. "Hey, watch out for that wrist." James called out. She stopped and stared at him. _And just like that he turns into my big brother again_, she thought. She became angry and turned to the hologeth with a vengeance. James grunted in frustration, she wasn't listening to him, again. They fought for an hour, Shepard dripping in sweat at the end. As they took off their armor, he looked over at her, "Your wrist is swollen up. I told you to take it easy." He said.

She flashed her eyes at him, "I guess I had some frustrations to take out," and slammed her weapon down on the table. He turned back to his equipment and put it away. They left the combat sims, Shepard exhausted, but furious. They got in the elevator alone. She couldn't help herself. "You know, just when I think you're different, you prove me wrong." She gave him a look of disgust.

"What are you talking about?"

She cocked her head and gave him a look like he was stupid. "Um, yesterday?" She pushed the button on the elevator, but it wouldn't work with her fingerprint. In frustration she kept pushing it. He reached across her and pushed it for their floor. As he leaned over her she was inches away from his face. She said quietly, "I thought for a minute you were a real man, but I guess I was wrong."

He was aware of cameras in the elevator. He looked up at them, then back down at her. She could see the flash of anger in his eyes, the tightening in his jaw and it excited her. She wanted to provoke him back into action, like last night. The elevator stopped and another soldier got on with them. They stood in silence, until the doors opened on their floor and they got out. They continued in silence until they were in their quarters. She stood inside the foyer and watched as he walked ahead of her and started to go towards his room.

"Just as I thought." She sneered. She had barely started to turn when he whipped around and grabbed her, pinning her against the wall. "Is that what you want? You like it rough?" he asked. She grinned and nodded. "Well, maybe you should get your Turian friend to take you and scratch you up."

"He wouldn't hold a candle to you, James."

"Get down." He ordered. He pushed her down on the floor. He pushed down his gym shorts and pulled his underwear down. She knelt down in front of him as he held her shoulder in one hand and the back of her head in the other. He entwined his hand in her hair and pulled her down on his penis. "Now take it in." he growled and she obliged, taking the head of his penis in her mouth. She wrapped her hand around the base and squeezed on it, while sucking and taking as much of it in her mouth as she could. He leaned his head back and groaned, then looked back down at her, the sight of her submitting to him so readily, pleasuring him was such a turn-on, and so unexpected, he had never been this way with a woman, why was he so compelled to act like this with her? She continued to lick and suck at him, alternating squeezing and twisting his shaft. The rest of his thoughts left him as he felt his release coming. "You're going to swallow," he commanded and held her down tightly on him as he came. He felt her continue to suck and swallow down everything he gave her. He started moving more slowly, catching his breath. He realized how tightly he'd been holding her head, and untangled his hands from her hair. He pulled her off and walked away into his quarters, closing the door behind him. He was starting to like this game they were playing. The more sexually forceful he was, the more she loved it. He let the water wash down over him and he leaned against the wall of the shower, smiling.

Shepard got off her knees and stood up. Damn, she had met her match. She walked over to her quarters and made her way to her bathroom and showered. As she shampooed her hair and let the weight of the water pull her hair down on her back, she reeled in the images of their tryst. He had been so big, she didn't think she'd be able to take him in her mouth. The feel of his hip as she'd gripped him in her hand to hold herself steady, she could feel the rippling muscles in his abdomen. She sighed, this was crazy, but she loved it, and loved how out of control she made him. She finished her shower and took her time with her hair and makeup. She put on some cream Liara had sent her. She dropped her bathrobe and rifled through her closet. She sighed. Nothing sexy in here. She got dressed and came out in the living room. It was empty, so she brought her datapad and sat on the couch organizing her data.

After a while she got a ping on the com. It was the relief guard. It hadn't occurred to her that James wasn't in his room.

_"__Just checking in with you, Shepard. Everything OK?"_

"Um, yea. I didn't know Vega had left."

_"__He had some business in town. He'll be back tonight."_

"Sure, no problem."

_"__You can contact me on the com if you need me. My name's Murphy." _

"Okay, thanks."

Shepard went to the fridge and got some ice for her wrist. The day's events in the combat sims and the heat from the shower was making it ache. She stood with the ice pack on it and wondered what James was doing. She wished she could go out in the city. Times like this the reality of her situation was impossible to ignore.

Later that night after she ate, she fell asleep on the couch. She woke up to James' hand on her leg. She grabbed it and started to raise her fist when she woke up enough to realize who it was.

"Dammit, James, you can't sneak up on me like that." She rubbed her eyes and sat up.

He sat down on the couch beside her, "I was calling your name."

He had his civilian clothes on and a jacket. She leaned over and grabbed his sleeve, smelling it.

"What are you doing?" he asked, confused by her reaction.

"I miss the smell of the outside world. You smell like restaurants and shops. Where have you been tonight?" she tried to sound nonchalant, but he heard the concern in her voice.

"Pretty much where you said. I got us some supplies for the next few days." He pointed at the bags on the kitchen counter. She squinted in the dim light. She looked back at James and saw him looking at her appreciatively. He leaned down as if to give her a kiss. _Oh no, not that easy_, she thought. She jumped up.

"Well, I'm going to bed. Goodnight." And she abruptly turned and left for her room, closing the door behind her.

James rubbed his Mohawk as he sat on the couch. He really didn't know how to act around her. He was so entranced by her, her fire, her strength, her body. He wondered how things would be going if they weren't together in this situation. Would she ever have given him a second glance? Did she feel like he was imposing on her? He looked at her door. He stood up and started putting the containers of food and groceries away. He decided he needed to stop playing games and talk to her tomorrow.

The next morning Shepard was up and getting ready for a run outside on the track. She put on her track jacket. She smiled thinking about the shocked look on James' face last night when she hadn't responded to his attempt at a kiss. She might be locked up here, but she wanted to make sure she was still in control. If anything happened, it was because she let it happen. She walked out and was stopped short by a bag outside her door. She leaned over and peered inside. There were some new clothes, more colorful, comfortable shorts and some slippers. She pulled out the slippers and looked them over.

"I hope they fit, I looked at your boots to get your size." James said, leaning on the wall across the room.

"They look great. It'll be nice to wear them around here."

"That's what I was thinking." James was relieved, walking towards her. He wasn't sure how she would like the things he had bought her. He wanted to do something nice for her, and he was limited in what he could do.

She put the slippers back in the bag and looked up at James. "Why didn't you tell me you were going out yesterday?"

"I wanted to surprise you. I didn't think it would take as long as it did. It was harder than I thought making decisions on what to get. If anything doesn't fit, give it back to me. I'll exchange it."

Suddenly Shepard frowned and her expression changed. James caught that, and said, "Lola? Everything okay?"

"I just, is… is this like a payment for my services or something?" she looked up at him.

James' was horrified, "Shit, no Shepard! It's not like that at all, I just wanted to do something nice for you-"

"Okay James, I appreciate it, really I do. I don't mean to sound ungrateful."

James paced back and forth shaking his head, "Dios mio, I see how it looks like that, I swear, that was not what I was thinking at all. I mean, a guy likes to get gifts for his girlfriend, you know?"

Shepard's eyebrows shot up, "Girlfriend?"

James turned beet red, "Well, yea, I suppose, I mean I was hoping, damn Lola, I don't know. This whole thing is so fucked up." He sat down on the couch and looked at the floor.

She put the bag down and started walking towards him. Suddenly there was a ping at the front door. She stopped and shot James and inquiring look. He walked purposefully to the door and brought up the vidfeed on it.

"It's Anderson." He said over his shoulder and opened it. James saluted as Anderson walked in. He returned the salute.

"Shepard! It's good to see you." Anderson walked over and shook her hand.

"David, it's wonderful to see you, come have a seat." She motioned to the couch and they sat down.

"What's that about?" he pointed to the metal brackets on her wrist.

"Oh, just a sparring injury. It's getting better." She smiled.

They talked for a while, about recent events, Anderson's attempts to talk to the Counsel to amend her sentence.

"I'm not getting anywhere, I won't lie to you. You're lucky you're not in a max security prison, though. This white collar set-up took a lot of pulled favors."

"I know sir. I can't tell you how much I appreciate it and how hard I've been working to keep up, with my research, my workouts. I know shit's going to hit the fan someday, and I'll be ready."

He smiled, "That's what I wanted to hear. So, how's it working out with Vega?"

"Oh, he's taking very good care of me."

Anderson leaned back on the couch. "I wasn't sure how it would go, Shepard. You're both pretty strong-willed people. But he's a good Marine. He'll protect you with his life and you can trust him."

"I know, David. Thanks for bringing him here. He's made a big difference in my ability to handle this whole situation."

"Glad to hear it. Well, I have to go. I've got a meeting with the prison warden to discuss further privileges you can have." He saw her look of anticipation. He held his hand up, "don't get too excited, I can't discuss it yet, until it's approved."

"That's okay, I just appreciate everything you're doing for me. It's nice to have you looking out for me."

"Shepard, you don't know how many of us are out there looking out for you." He got up from the couch and started for the door. He pinged James' quarters for him to come out.

Shepard laughed, "Garrus said the same thing to me when he was here."

"Well, it's true. I'm glad Garrus was able to come see you. I've attempted to contact Tali, but she's working on something for the floatilla. She's not able to make here, but I left her an open invitation. I think Kaidan may be coming to see you soon, though."

Shepard stiffened up. "I don't think that's a good idea."

Anderson looked puzzled. James stood by his door, arms crossed, his jaw set.

"What's the problem, Shepard?" Anderson asked.

"We didn't exactly leave on good terms." She shook her head.

"Well, I figured you guys had a long history together, I didn't think it was a problem." Anderson stood with his hands out, "but it's completely up to you. If you don't want him to come see you, I'll let him know that."

"Yes, please do. Thanks." She glanced up at James.

The three of them stood around awkwardly for a few moments. Anderson cleared his throat, "Well, I'll be going now. I don't want to be late." He shook Shepard's hand again, then saluted Vega. "Good work, Lieutenant. And I'm glad to see you haven't killed each other yet."

Vega laughed, "We came close a few times, sir."

Anderson looked down at Shepard's wrist and grinned. Vega let him out, then turned to look at Shepard.

"We'd better get going."

"Where to?" she asked.

He pointed to her wrist. "It's been 2 weeks. Your follow-up appointment is today."

"Oh, well good. I'd love to get this thing off."

They went to medward where the doctor decided her wrist had healed enough to remove the supportive hardware. He removed it, and gave her a datapad with exercises to do to continue to rehabilitate her wrist.

As they walked down the hall back to their quarters, Shepard scrolled through the datapad. "You know, I never used to bother with all these recommendations, but I've got time now, so I guess I'll give them a try for once."

"Yea, I can help you with the stretching part-" James stopped.

"Hey, how are you doing?" an attractive blond woman came up to James.

"Great, doing great." James said.

Shepard had walked ahead a few feet, unaware James had stopped. She looked up from her datapad and turned around. The woman put her hand on James' arm, saying, "Thanks again for the bathrobe." and smiled.

"Yea, sure no problem." James smiled back.

Shepard froze and her eyes widened, then narrowed to slits. She turned and started walking away towards their quarters. Then she heard it behind her– the giggle. She remembered it from that night right outside their door. She walked faster.

"Oh, uh, I have to go," James said and walked quickly to catch up to Shepard's pace. One sideways glance at her tight lips and angry stride, James knew she was pissed.

He punched the code for their quarters, and she stormed in. He closed the door behind him and braced himself. She threw the data pad on the kitchen counter.

"So who was that James? One of your many girlfriends?" Her eyes were blazing.

"Look, it's not what you think."

"Yea, right! I'm not stupid, I saw the look in her eyes and her laugh, I remember it. She was outside the door that night you got me the bathrobe. I suppose you got her one too, huh? Is that what you get them all?"

James sighed and leaned his hands on the counter, "Yea, you've caught me Shepard, that's what I do." he said sarcastically.

_Now he's calling me Shepard again, too._ She huffed and turned on her heels and went to her quarters. She stripped her clothes off and grabbed all the clothes out of her closet, everything he'd given her and piled it up on the floor in her room. Then she walked out to the living room so she wouldn't be caught on vid feed. She sat on the couch, naked.

"Dios, mio. What are you doing?" he put his head in his hands and shook his head.

She refused to look at him. "I'm not going to be one of your whores, I don't want any of your stuff."

"Oh, so you're just going to walk around naked, then are you? That makes a lot of sense." He walked towards her, taking off his t-shirt.

"Yea, that's right. I can do what I want. This is my place."

He stood with his t-shirt in his hand. "Look, I asked her advice for what to get you that night. I'm terrible with shopping and I wanted to get some things you would like. When I mentioned the bathrobe, she commented that's what she would like. I got two and gave her one, just as a thank you for her help. I also showed the stuff to her when I got back, to get an opinion that I didn't get lame stuff for you. You liked it didn't you?"

Shepard sat, looking straight ahead. She was still angry.

James threw his shirt at her. "Put that on. You've got to wear something." She shot him a nasty look.

"Is that what you like, blondes?" she sat with the shirt in her lap.

"No, I like bitchy, curly, dark haired girls."

She looked up at him. He stood with his bare chest, smirking at her. She started putting his shirt on over her head. "You know I'm not giving this back to you."

He grinned, "I'm fine with that." He walked out and went to her quarters. Over the next 5 minutes he put all her things back in her closet and drawers. He came back out to the living room. She was still pouting on the couch sitting with his shirt on. He sat across from her on the couch. "So why are you still upset?"

"Because…because, I just am."

"Lola, come on. I explained it to you. She's one of the guards here. I barely know her. There are lots of other guards you never see. When I went to training, she was one of the ones in my class."

"But she touched you!" she said, standing up.

He stood up too, "So?"

"But she can't." Shepard raised her voice.

"Really, why not?" James looked down at her.

She got closer and poked at his chest, "Because you're mine!" She winced. She silently cursed herself for letting that slip.

He grabbed her hand. Shepard tried to pull it away. James held on tight, "Oh, no, you're not running away this time."

James smiled down at her, _Gotcha._

She looked down. All her bravado melted away as she felt his eyes boring down into her soul. He flattened her hand against his bare chest and put his other hand around her waist, pulling her in close.

"Lola, you're the only one. There's no one else, and there never will be."

She looked up at him skeptically. "I'm trapped here, James, I've got no way to know what's going on outside these walls. You could be totally playing me, and I'd never know."

"Oh, you'd know. I'm not that good an actor. And I'm not an asshole. You even said so yourself, once."

She laughed.

"You'll just have to trust me."

She bit her lip, "That's really hard for me to do."

"That's because you've never had anyone value you enough to earn it." James hugged her tighter.

She thought about Kaidan, other relationships in her life and realized he was right. She'd made him work for it, and he hadn't ever let her down. He'd trusted her too, if she'd wanted too, she could have gone to HQ and complained about his sexual advances. He'd taken a chance on her.

She relaxed into his embrace. "So, you sure you want to do this?"

He stroked the back of her hair, "That's a pretty strange question after you've had my dick in your mouth."

She slapped his chest, but he wouldn't let her pull away. "Come on, turn around for me." He said seductively.

She obliged, and James guided her closer to the couch. She knelt on the seat, holding herself up with her hands on the back of the couch. She gasped when she felt James slowly dart his finger up between her folds. He rubbed her round ass cheek with his other hand, then held onto her hip tightly so he could push his finger farther into her. She held on tightly to the back of the couch, pushing against his thrusts. He pulled his finger out slightly so he could roughly put two back in, Shepard moaning in pleasure. "Oh god, James."

He pulled his hands away and Shepard heard the buckle of his pants come off. She trembled in anticipation of finally feeling him inside her. She felt his warm hand on her thigh, and with a loud snap she was shocked with the feel of the of his belt whipping against her backside. She arched and yelled out in surprise. He did it again, then said, "Did Kaidan make you scream like this?"

"Unh, no, no."

Another snap and sting on her ass. She gasped and said, "You're going to leave marks."

"That's okay. You've got marks. A few more won't make a difference, and these will be from me." He snapped her again.

She heard the belt fall down on the floor. He reached his hands on either side of her thighs and spread them apart. She held on to the couch and caught her breath. She felt his warm breath for a second, then his tongue snake inside her. He reached a hand around and started to massage her clit at the same time. She arched her head back and moaned. The sting still fresh on her ass cheeks, the waves of pleasure his tongue was giving her, she felt like she was going to pass out. She could feel herself coming close, then suddenly he pulled out and smacked her backside with his hand.

"You don't cum until I tell you you can." He growled.

She nodded.

"Did Garrus do that for you?" he asked.

"I told you, we never had sex."

"Never did it with a turian?"

"I didn't say that." She said, and braced herself.

He laughed. "Well, that's good. Then you'll be prepared. It's not ribbed, but it's just as massive."

She looked back at him over her shoulder, "I know that already. My jaw's still sore."

James laughed again, then grabbed her ass cheeks and squeezed them. "Turn around." He commanded.

She turned around and faced him. He was standing naked in front of her for the first time. She admired his muscles, his strength. His tattoo was completely visible and she ran her hand over his chest and down his rippled abs, down to feel his hair and reach her hand around his cock. It was massive, just as she had remembered it. He pulled her hand away, and as she opened her mouth to protest, she was silenced by him leaning down and taking one of her nipples in his mouth and sucking on it, gently at first, then harder. She gasped and entwined her hands in his hair and leaned over into him. Again she felt as if the pleasure he was giving her would make her explode. If he didn't allow her to have her release soon, she thought she would go insane. He grabbed her breast with his hand and squeezed it as he sucked harder.

"James, James." She whispered.

"Did you used to call Kaidan's name out too?" he stood up.

"Why do you keep bringing him up?" she asked.

"Because I want you to know who you belong to now." He turned her around again and wrapped her hair around his hand. He walked her over to the wall and held her against it, her back towards him. She braced her arms against the wall while he kicked her legs apart. He leaned over close to her ear, "Did you call his name out?"

"Yes." She felt a smack of his hand against her ass. She drew her breath in sharply.

"Do you want to feel his dick in you?" another smack.

She recoiled from the sting, "No, never. I want to feel you James."

"Louder." he said. Another smack.

She yelled out, "I want to feel you James!"

He reached his hand around her pelvis and she could feel the head of his penis at the opening of her hot core. "Say it!" he commanded.

"Give it to me James, I need you, I need you now!" she cried out.

He pushed his cock into her roughly, "Take all of it." He growled, and he pushed up to her hilt, ramming her relentlessly as he pulled her pelvis back against him. She wrapped her legs behind him and he groaned, "God, you're so tight!"

"Uh, uh, that's because," she panted, "I haven't had sex since I was rebuilt by Cerberus."

The thought of being her first since she came back from the brink of death excited him more, and as he started to feel his release, he told her, "Now, do it now!" and he felt her walls clamp down on him as she screamed out, "I'm cumming, I'm cumming!" they rode the white hot waves of their climax together, going harder and farther than either of them ever had with anyone before. They slowed their movements and James covered her with kisses as he held her weight up. She went limp from the release, physical and emotional.

He pulled her away from the wall, still inside her, and sat down on the floor, Shepard sitting on his lap facing away from him. He caressed her and continued pelting her back with hot kisses. "I hope I didn't hurt you." He said, reaching around and hugging her to him.

"No, not anything I can't handle." She leaned against him. She could feel him start to get harder inside her again. She started writhing on top of him, leaning over and holding onto his legs, pushing against his pelvis.

"Ohhh, Lola. I don't want to hurt you." He hadn't known it had been years since she'd had sex.

She scoffed, "You concerned about that now? You know I like it rough." She moved harder, faster. James grabbed onto her hips and moved her back and forth on top of him. He leaned his head back against the cool wall behind him.

"Who do you belong to?" he asked her.

"What?" she said breathlessly.

He smacked the outside of her thigh, "I said, who do you belong to?"

"You James, I belong to you."

"That's right. You belong to me." He grinded her against him.

She felt him get harder and longer inside her, and started to feel herself come close again.

"No," he said roughly, "don't cum again."

She focused her efforts on James. She held onto his legs and pistoned back and forth on him. She felt him lean up against her and bite down on her shoulder. "Damn, it's like being with a Turian."

"You like being with Turians?" he asked her.

"Yea." She said.

"So do I. Maybe we can try a threesome someday." He grabbed her and picked up his speed, pushing into her deeper.

"You've been with a Turian female?"

"No, Turian males. And before you ask, only Turians. Not humans." He gripped her arms tightly, digging his fingers into her.

She was surprised at his confession, but intrigued. A threesome with him and a Turian male would be exciting. She started to feel herself tighten around him, and took deep calming breaths to keep herself from climaxing. Soon she felt him cum again inside her, spasming. She moved a little slower and rocked back and forth gently on him. She looked back behind her at him, "Feel good?"

He opened his eyes and looked at her. He stroked her back, "Lola, where have you been all my life?"

"God James, waiting to live, apparently."


End file.
